Confessions of a Drunk Kunoichi
by Pretzel Face
Summary: Sasuke is forced to walk a drunk Sakura home, But a simple task soon turns into a night of endless Vodka shots and Seductive Kunoichi's! Can Sasuke resist her drunken advances? NO! Crackish. Usual pairings.
1. Sasuke the perfect gentleman

**Summary: Unfortunatley for Sasuke, When you've been drinking with your homies (ha ha) Inner Sakura just seems so much WISER!**

**I really hope you like this. I'm not sure what i think of it. Sakura is OOC in this but only because of all the drunk. ---- which I can't really be blamed for.**

**Disclaimer: I can't afford to own Naruto. I spend all my money on Pretzels. Therefore I am BROKE.**

**On wif the story Jack! **

**Btw.. My name isn't Jack.**

**Enjoy x**

* * *

'But Kakashi-senseiii, Im not even -hic- tired yeeet!' Sakura whined. 

The low rumble of naruto's stomach could be heard. But was ignored.

'Hey, any of you guys fancy getting some ramen?'

'MEEE!' Sakura sang.

'Sakura?? You want **Ramen**?!' Naruto stared in disbelief.

'..oh… no.' She said Lazily.

Sasuke rolled his eyes.

'Sasuke, walk Sakura home she can't go on her own.' Kakashi spoke up from his perverted book of wonders. **(A/n Icha Icha paradise if you didn't get that. :)**

'Yea man, she's pissed out of her **head!**' Naruto yelled tactlessly.

Sakura stared at him cluelessly.

'WWWHOOO MEEE?'

'Yes. **You**.' Sasuke said dryly.

**Inner Sakura: Couldn't have been.**

Then who stoled the cookie from the cookie jar!' Sakura Sang proudly.

'see?'

**Inner Sakura: Drunk .. me..?**

'Pfft... AM NOT!'

Sakura sat down on her stool and crossed her arms against her chest defiantly.

Before slowly toppling off it again.

Sweat dropped as the three stared at the girl giggling stupidly to herself on the floor.

'Sakura get up. Sasuke is going to walk you home.'

Sasuke glared at Kakashi.

Who conveniently became very interested in the next page of his Icha Icha paradise book. (**A/n:** **Like he hasn't read it all a million times before.)**

'Be a MAN Uchiha!' taunted Naruto slapping him hard on the back.

Sasuke groaned.

'Sasuke is walking me home?' **(A/n and cue chibi!)** Sakura said with watery hopeful eyes and biting her bottom lip like a child.

**Inner Sakura: Alright!!! Sasuke's gonna walk us home!! **

'Yea he is. Right Sasuke?' Kakashi said carefully avoiding eye contact.

'…Hn.'

**Freakin' Great.** he thought to himself.

**Inner Sakura: hell yea! Sasuke's our bitch!**

Sakura happily pulled herself to her feet.

'WEEEE! Lets go Sasuke-kuuuuun!'

She started towards Sasuke before promptly tripping over her own feet.

She landed straight in Sasuke's arms.

She giggled childishly, and looked up into his eyes, dazed a little.

A faint blush rose to Sasuke's cheeks as he stared down at her.

Her lips were tainted red from all the cocktails she had drank.

**Shit. This is gonna be a long night.**

'Er, you ok?' he asked.

She regained her balanced and placed a comforting hand on his shoulder.

He looked at her quizically.

She sighed looking at him sympathetically.

'Sasuke...' She whispered.glancing around to check no one was eaves dropping. 'I think you're a bit drunk.'

He rolled his eyes.

'Don't worry! I really don't think the others have noticed.' She rambled on. 'If you leave now. You may be able to get away with it.'

Before he realized what was happening he was being dragged towards the door.

He shot a desperate look towards Naruto and Kakashi.

Kakashi simply Smirked and went back to looking at his Icha Icha paradise book.

**Shame I'm gonna miss all the action. **

'Good luck temeeee!' Naruto yelled at the couple.

**Dobe.**

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

When they were out of veiw from Kakashi and Naruto Sakura turned to Sasuke whacking him playfully on the arm.

**Ok that's gonna bruise.**

'You're IT!' She yelled before running off into a nearby pub.

Sasuke followed her reluctantly.

**This girl is hard work.**

Once inside Sasuke became increasingly uneasy at the amount of strong and wrestler-like men he saw inside.

He glanced around in search for Sakura and immediatley spotted her brght pink hair harassing a butch man at the bar.

**This girl's gonna get herself killed.**

'.. I like clay. It's Mushy. but I'll tell you want i don't like, STARFISH! PAH! STARFISH! they don't even have BRAINS!'

The butch man unsure of what to say to her, simply offered to by her a beer.

At that Sakura beamed.

**That's my cue. **Thought Sasuke as he swooped in.

'I think you've had enough.' He said as he slid his arms round her waist and lifted her from her stool.

'Noooooooooo!' she yelped as she clung onto the bar counter, clawing at it desperatley.

'Sakura like beer. Beer foamy!' She yelled as he dragged her out the bar.

Sasuke set her down outside and the drunken kunoichi seemed to forget all about her need for alcohol.

He watched her as she spun around in the moonlight. He let his thoughts wander to how pretty she looked.

**Keep your mind on the task man.**

He watched as her skirt rose up a little in the wind. A faint blush tinged his cheeks.

realising this was going to be more of a challenge than first anticipated. He was fighting the temptation to just let her go it alone. (**Tsk Tsk**. **BAD SASUKE-KUN**)

'Hey, errrr, You know your way?' He asked.

'I surely do!' She said wandering of in a vague direction.

**Obviously not.**

He aimed her down a path in the right direction, but Sakura appeared to want to take her time.

Sasuke stood impatiently as Sakura danced around smelling all the flowers. (**A/n: Do flowers come out at night? Any florists in here? SPEAK UP PEOPLE!)**

'Sakura. Lets. Go' He said anxious to get this over with.

'**LOOK **SASUKE!' She waved a flower in his face.

Her eyes followed the flower as she waved it back and forwards in front of his eyes.

Her vision became dizzy and she stumbled forward.

Sasuke immediately steadied her.

'Smell it Sasuke kun!'

'Hn. I don't like flowers.'

'No of **course** you don't Mr grumpy kins!' She said pinching his cheeks.

He grabbed her wrist tightly.

'Don't ever. Do. that. Again.' He said warningly. The Uchiha death glare threatening to pierce a whole in her head.

She beamed.

'OH SASUKE-KUN! If you WANTED to hold hands you should have SAID so!!!'

She grabbed his hand and stomped off dragging him behind her with that monsterous strength of hers.

Sasuke groaned.

**Hn. At least we're moving now.**

Sakura continued skipping along the path singing rather loudly. (and out of tune)

'Sasuke- kun's my **boyfriend**, he likes it when we hold HAAAANDS!' She screeched and Sasuke winced.

**Oh good god.**

She slurred the next few lines unable to get the words out. (**A/n: Due to her current state of drunkeness. oh the fun i can have! -evil grin-)**

'Shut **up **Sakura.'

'Oh **riiiight**, _Sorry_ Sasuke kun! Does holding my hand make it too hard to pull off the tough-brooding-avenger image you try SO hard to maintain?'

'...'

'I understand compleeeeetley.' She dropped his hand and stomped off in a huff.

He sighed in relief and continued walking while he waiting for the feeling to return to his hands.

He clenched and unclenched it as the numbness faded.

**She really doesn't realise how strong she is.** He thought whilst staring down at his pinkish hand.

When he bumped into something.

He looked up and there was Sakura staring up at the tree in front of them in disbelief.

'OMFG! LOOK!' She screamed pointing at the tree.

'A POSSUM!' she screamed at the top of her lungs running towards the tree arms outstretched in front of her.

Earning herself a fair amount of odd looks from passers by.

'Oh no wait... it's just a squirrel.' she said disappointed.

'Damn, Thats was so close to.' Sasuke said sarcastically.

She spun around and glared at him.

'Kiss now.' She demanded.

'**WHAT?!?!**' He stared at her in disbelief.

**Is this girl on crack?!**

Sakura pouted.

**Hmmm. Why isn't he kissing me? **

**Inner Sakura: Don't ASK for the kiss, stupid! Just go get it yourself!!!!!!**

**Oh YEA! You're so WISE inner mee!**

**Inner Sakura: Yeah yeah... Just go get me some Sasuke-Kun!**

She shrugged happily, before shoving him up against a tree and forcing her lips upon his.

To be continued...

* * *

**Man is that Hang over gonna be a bitch. (Well only if I want it to be! -grins-)**

**I'll write a second chapter If you guys like this one! Please review and tell me what you think!**

**Thanks x**

**Pretzel Face x**


	2. Welcome to club Konoha!

**Summary:**** Sasuke gets a bit tipsy. Neji and Tenten finally hook it up and Hinata finds her seductive side! Insane OOCness sorry... but blame the sake!**

**I had a few suggestions to throw a drunk Sasuke into the blender of fun! So i thought. Hm why not. I prolly could have done alot better on this chapter but i'm loosing trust in this fic...**

**If you review I'll write another chapter!**

* * *

**Previously: **

**She shrugged happily, before shoving him up against a tree and forcing her lips upon his.**

Sasuke's eyes automatically closed at the contact of her soft lips against his.

He ignored the burning temptation to kiss her back and snake his arms around her waist.

but he was finding it hard to ignore the voice in his head saying;

**Hell yea! Take her back to your place and have your way with her.**

The other more rational side of him was thinking;

**Dude she's drunk, you know she'll hate you in the morning.**

He felt himself giving in as he felt her arms wrapped themselves around his neck.

'**Aw! Youthful lovers on a midnight stroll!'**

Sakura spun around.

Sasuke forced down a feeling of disappointment at the loss of contact.

**Inner Sakura:** **Whyyyy? Why are we stopping the kissing???**

Lee's jaw promptly hit the floor when he realized who it was.

'M-m-my Sakura flower!'

'LEE FLOWER!!!'

She threw herself at him in a tight embrace.

Lee's eyes filled with hearts as he stared at her in awe.

Loosing interest in him, Sakura began poking at his masculine eyebrows.

'Hey are these things **REAL**?' she asked him curiously.

'Oooook we're leaving now.' Sasuke insisted dragging Sakura away from him.

Lee instantly snapped out of it.

'My Sakura flower!' He pined after her.

She waved giddily at him as Sasuke dragged her down the path.

Lee collapsed on the floor.

'Oh I give up.' **(A/N GASP!)**

'NO LEE!' Gai sensei appeared in his manly voice.

'GAI SENSEI! You are right, Gai Sensei! I will train hard in the spring time of youth!'

'OH LEE'

'GAI SENSEI!'

'OH LEE!'

'Oh screw it wheres the whisky?'

* * *

Sasuke mentally thanked Lee for the interruption.

**I'm not so sure I can trust myself alone with her.**

'Hey forehead! Is that you?!' A voice called from the distance.

Sasuke groaned.

**Great. Ino.**

Ino strolled up to them Shikamaru and Tenten at her side.

'Hey!' Ino said enthusiastically.

'Hn'

'Ever the sweet talker aren't you Sasuke-kun?'

-Glare-

'Ok then. Sooo Forehead, What ya doing all **alone**. In the **dark**. with **Sasuke-kun**?' She said suggestively

Sakura's eyes were filling with tears of happiness.

'.. My… Friends.' She said proudly reaching out to them.

All three of them threw questioning looks at Sasuke.

'Ignore it. It's drunk.'

'I. AM. NOT.DRUNK' she yelled pointing at Sasuke defiantly.

'We believe you… really.' he responded sarcastically.

**Yea just like we believed Orochimaru when he insisted he wasn't Michael Jackson. **

**(A/N Heir of Slytherin prehaps? but I guess Harry Potter's not COOL enough anymore… Sigh…)**

'Well in that case would you guys like to join us?' asked Tenten

'Yea, Were going to that new club that just opened.'

That caught Sakura's attention.

**Inner Sakura: A club…? with alcohol…?**

'Oh oh !! me me! Can I come too?'

'It's ok if they come with us, right Shikamaru?'

He sighed.

'Am I supposed to say yes to this?'

'Yes.'

'...Yes.' he complied dryly.

'Awesome! You coming?'

'Hn.'

**If we're with them, at least I won't be alone with her which is good. **

**But, If we go Sakura's most likely gonna have more drink, which is bad. **

**Leaving me to walk home an even **_**more**_** drunk Sakura, Which is very **_**very**_** bad.**

**But you might be able to foist her off on one of these morons. Which is just. Pure. genius.**

Sasuke's selfishness won through and they all made their way to the club.

With a very unstable Sakura behind them.

* * *

**When they arrived… **

The club was quite busy, and the dance floor was filled with people. The strobe lights were blinding and they made their way towards the bar.

To Sasuke's surprise he saw Naruto who seemed to be in deep conversation with Hinata.

Though, Naruto seemed to be doing all the talking which was less suprising.

**Hn. I figured he'd be scoffing his face with Ichiraku ramen by now.**

'You didn't tell me **Neji** was going to be here!' Tenten whispered nudging Ino in the ribs.

'Psh! Relax and enjoy yourself!'

Sasuke reluctantly took a seat making sure Sakura was next to him so he could keep an eye on her.

'VODKA SHOTS ALL AROUND!' Naruto yelled!

'Ooooh YAY!'

Sakura clapped her hands enthusiastically

Sasuke groaned to himself.

**I'm not so sure this was a great idea.**

He downed Sakura's Shot the instant it hit the table.

**I'm not taking any chances. **He thought before swiftly downing his own.

Sakura simply assumed she had already drank hers and began asking for another.

'More! More!' She said gleefully, whilst banging her empty shot glass on the table and swinging her legs.

* * *

**10 Minutes later… **

The Music was getting louder and the vodka shots kept on coming.

Sakura was getting seriously puzzled as to where her shots kept disappearing to.

And Hinata was dancing suggestively for Naruto.

Who seemed to be enjoying every minute of it.

'Omg! Sasuke this is my **favourite** song!! It must be **FATE**!'

**Oh, definitely. Fate has fucked me over before, why should it stop now?**

Sakura dragged a hesistant Sasuke onto the dance floor.

**Meanwhile in Sand…**

Gaara: -Slams fridge door- Damn! All out of Bacon! -Grins- Lets go to Konoha!!!

Temari: -Blink Blink-

**Back in Konoha…**

Sasuke was fighting the increasing urge to look down Sakura's top as she twisted and pushed herself up against him.

'Come **on** Sasuke! Dance with me!'

He blushed slightly at the touch of her skin.

'Sakura… I don't dance.'

'Come **on!** It's easy Sasuke-Kun!' She said grabbing his hands and placing them a little to low for his liking.

He yanked them back in shock.

She pouted.

'Dance with me Sasuke-kuuuun' She said grabbing his hands again.

'Let **GO **woman!'

His Uchiha Death glare was having little effect on the drunken kunoichi.

She linked her fingers with his and pulled them around her waist as she pressed her back into his chest.

He could smell the the cherry fragrance of her hair.

**Screw it.**

he spun her around and pulled her closer as she danced seductively.

He looked down at her lips.

'WHO WANT'S MORE SHOTS?!'

'OH! OH! ME! ME! ME!'

She tore herself from him ran over to the bar dragging Sasuke behind her.

* * *

**10 more minutes later… **

No one seemed too surprised as Gaara entered the club grandly surrounded by Sand and the like.

'Hey man' Said Shikamaru nodding in his direction.

'-Blink Blink- Waaah! I got Sand in my eye!' He squeeled, running off in the direction of the bathroom, in flood of tears.

'…'

Sasuke, who was now rather drunk on account of all the shots he had been 'looking after' for Sakura, seemed to have lost his ability to stick to one word sentences.

'Yo! where my homies **at**?!' He yelled slapping Neji on the back.

'…'

Neji stared at him in disbelief.

**Wow Uchiha I didn't think you had it in you.**

'More.' Sasuke demanded from the bartender.

'I really don't think-'

'More.' He said glaring at him.

Sakura giggled as she ran off after Gaara.

Not wanting to loose sight of her Sasuke yelled out to her.

He got up to follow her, but dizziness caused him to sit back down again.

'Damn. So dizzy. Another wasted breath…-sigh- again I go unnoticed.'

Neji stared at him.

'You think **you've** got problems? GODAMMIT! Girls don't go for guys without pupils!'

'I do…' whispered Tenten seductively from behind him.

'…'

Neji stared at her.

'You wanna go back to mine and err.. talk?'

Neji's eyes grew wide.

'Hell yes! Later Uchiha.'

**Hn. Damn. Hyuuga gets all the women.**

He groaned before ordering some more sake.

**More time passed… **

**More shots were drank…**

Sasuke was happily sipping his sake and swinging his legs from his bar stool. (**A/N You know somethings up when you use Sasuke and happily in the same sentence!**)

He wasn't paying much attention to what was going on around him.

He was vaguely aware of Ino and Shikamaru heatedly making out in the corner (**a/n thought I'd throw that in there for the ShikaIno fans out there!)**

When he saw Sakura.

And she saw him right back.

She threw him a flirty look as she and Hinata danced slowly to the music.

She spun around and Sasuke watched as she swayed her hips to the beat.

He couldn't take his eyes off her.

Though if he did he would have noticed that Hinata was pulling some _very_ slutty moves on the dance floor!

The Song ended and Hinata stumbled over to go join Naruto.

'Umm.. Naruto-Kun… You wanna go hang out in the Hyuuga dojo?' She whispered seductively into his ear.

He blushed and nodded furiously.

She giggled and pulled him towards the exit.

Pouting, at the fact everyone was leaving, Sakura skipped over to Sasuke.

She stood in between his legs and he shifted slightly, uncomfortable with her being in such close proximity to him.

He felt a familiar heat rise to his cheeks as her face got closer to his.

'Mine.' She announced, before closing the gap in between them.

Sasuke was shocked at the sudden action but in a moment her lips were gone form his and she was dragging him towards the exit.

Sasuke, being drunk and all, wasn't putting up much of a fight.

'Definitley mine.'

* * *

**Tsunade: Go Sakura Go!**

**Orochimaru: No really.. I'm not the Heir of Slytherin.**

**Kakashi: Why do i read this crap? -Throws Icha Icha book- **

**Me: If you promise to review i'll get these guys to shut up! I have that kinda power you know. no joke.**

**Thanks to those 18 who reviewed chapter 1! x**

**Pretzel Face x**


	3. Theres something about Sakura

**Summary: Kakashi and Jiraiya's involvment in Sakura's drunkness is revealed! Tsunade joins the fun, and Sasuke tries his hand at seduction!**

**Hey guys thank you SO much for all the reviews! I can't actually tell you how grateful I am to all you guys! **

**Special Thanks to those of you who reviewed more than once and/or Favourited me! Kisses and Hugs and Pretzels to all of you!**

**It's a bit rushed but you get the idea.**

On wif the story Bessie!

* * *

**Previously:**

…**in a moment her lips were gone f****rom his and she was dragging him towards the exit.**

**Sasuke, being drunk and all, wasn't putting up much of a fight.**

'**Definitley mine.'**

Up on the rooftops of Konoha a certain grey-haired Jounin and a particular Ero-sennin, watched as the pink haired Kunoichi dragged a dazed Uchiha out of Club Konoha. **(A/n Snazzy name or what!!)**

'This kid takes forever to make a move, Kakashi.'

'Yea and I spent all that money on Sakura's cocktails too.'

'Well can't you speed things along a bit? I can't write the sequel to make out paradise with so little inspiration…' Jiraiya sobbed.

'Looks like it's time for plan B!'

He stood up and grabbed a smalled Icha sized book from his pouch and disappeared in a puff of smoke.

**

* * *

****Meanwhile…**

Sakura dragged Sasuke into the darkness and found herself getting utterly lost.

'Nyaaa! I'm lost Sasuke-Kun! I'm scared and it's dark here!'

Sasuke however, didn't have a chance to reply as she immediately started stomping off in another direction.

'Ayah! It all looks the same! Where _are_ we Sasuke-kun?!'

'Fuck knows.'

**Inner Sakura: Hm...My fangirl senses are tingling.**

'Hmph, wait here Sasuke-kun.' Sakura said firmly plonking him down in the middle of nowhere before stomping off in a random direction.

Sasuke just blinked a few times as he sat and watched her stomp of into the darkness.

POOF!

Kakashi sensei appeared at his side.

'Yo! Looks like you could do with some help.'

'Psh! I'm not lost.' Sasuke insisted looking up to a blurr of Kakashi-ness.

'err.. no. That's not what I meant… Here!'

He lent down and handed the raven haired boy a small pink book.

Sasuke stared down at it and began to read the title aloud.

'…How…T…' He struggled to read it.

He frowned at it in frustration.

'Not a fantastic reader, are you?'

'Well normally I am...but the words seem to be moving…'

He narrowed his eyes trying harder to focus.

It didn't do much good.

Sighing Kakashi whacked him round the head.

'Nyah!'

'Better?'

Sasuke swayed back and forth for a few seconds before staring at the book again.

'Hn. Yeah'

He winced at the pain in the back of his head as he felt himself sobering up a little.

'How to pink up pink haired nins'

He threw a quizzical look at his teacher, who simply gave a innocent shrug.

Sasuke narrowed his eyes.

'How did you know I was here?' Sasuke asked suspiciously.

'errr…'

Sasuke tried to stand up but lost his balance and toppled back to the floor again.

'I used my Sharingan eye!' Kakashi said nodding intelligently.

'Woah! You used it to find me? Dude you are like the Sharingan MASTER!'

Kakashi stared at him in disbelief.

**Wow he actually bought that? What a fucktard. **

'Hn. Sensei…how did you even get Sharingan in the first place?'

'Oh this? It's really just a contact lense I won in a cereal box.' He said offhandedly.

'Oh, that makes sense…' Sasuke said nodding to himself.

**Man, I love drunk Sasuke. **

Sasuke opened the book curiously.

'Are you sure this is going to work?

'Of course! It's 100 per cent Icha Icha approved! So put it to good use!'

He slapped him encouragingly on the back and disappeared into the night.

* * *

'Ok just sit back and watch the show!' Kakashi announced as he rejoined Jiraiya, who proceeded to set up his camera. 

Jiraiya wiped a joyful tear from his eye.

'Such inspiration! This night will be of much use to me! Especially Sakura in her tight little-'

He was interrupted as a drunken Tsunade stumbled her way onto the roof.

'Hey you made it.' Kakashi said coolly.

'What's this I hear about my apprentice getting the man of her dreams?' She slurred out.

Before proceeding to take a long sip of some kind of alcoholic beverage.

She toppled over near Jiraiya.

'Hey watch the camera!'

She simply stared at him and giggled stupidly in response.

He rolled his eyes.

'-hic- Does anybody else –hic- think my breasts are ridiculously huge?'

She stared down at her ever growing chest in curiosity.

As did the other two men.

She clambered to her feet and looked down from the top of the roof before almost loosing her balance.

Kakashi caught her just in time.

Whilst Jiraiya continued to stare at her cleavage.

**It's all about the art of seduction man. **

He then began to shiver dramatically.

'Brrr! My hands are cold.' He looked around innocently. 'Can I warm up them in your heaving breasts?'

'-Hic- Perv.'

'Psh. Drunk.'

**

* * *

****Elsewhere…**

Sasuke opened the first page of his 'How to pick up Pink Haired nins' book.

**Welcome! To the introduction of 'How to pink up haired nins!'**

**We are going to help you successfully seduce that pink haired kunoichi you've so obviously been pining for.**

**Note: No. You really wern't as subtle as you thought you were.**

Impatiently, Sasuke skipped to the next page.

**Chapter 1:**

**Note: **

**Girls like men who are MANLY. **

**They also happen to like their men to be sensitive at the same time. **

**T****hey don't like a man who only likes them for their looks, but they want him to think that their hot at the same time etc.**

**Since no man can be all these things at once. We're here to tell you how to fake it!**

**Step 1 – Greetings.**

**Have a smooth opening line.**

**Note:**

**If you are having trouble thinking of one on your own, please use our very sophisticated and particularly manly example:**

**e.g**

**Hey Baby.**

'Eh? That's it?'

He looked up from his book as Sakura came striding back to him.

'I know where we are now Sasuke-Kun! Follow mee!'

However she looked confused again and wandered off back in the direction she came from.

He returned his eyes to the book and began to saunter after her.

It wasn't long before he caught up to her.

He cleared his throat.

'Uh hey baby.'

She began to mutter to herself about directions, clearly not paying any attention to him.

Deciding that counted anyway he moved on to the next step.

**Step 2**

**Offer to buy your pink haired Kunoichi a drink.**

**Note: Price of the beverage is of no relevance, as long as alcohol content is just as high. **

Sasuke looked up from his book at Sakura.

She was struggling to walk in a straight line.

Deciding he could skip that step he moved straight on to step 3.

**Step 3 – Chat up lines.**

**Chat up lines are the key to a man's success. **

**We have provided a few that we have come to find are very good at getting a females attention.**

**Pick the one you feel is most suitable for your pink haired nin.**

Sasuke looked down the list and blushed furiously at the wide range of sexual innuendos.

'EH?!'

He decided to play it safe and picked one of the ones that seemed less… crude.

'Uh, Sakura? Do you have a map coz I'm lost in your eyes.'

He cringed at the cheesiness of it all.

But Sakura was just as drunk and clueless as ever.

'Don't worry Sasuke-kun! I know exactly where we're going just follow me!'

He groaned.

**Psh, what a moron. This is so much effort.**

Looking down the list he tried again.

'Have you always been this cute or is it something you had to work for?'

She stopped walking and swiveled around unsteadily.

Her eyes were wide with wonder

'You think I'm cute Sasuke-kun?'

An eminent blush rose to her cheeks.

She stared blankly at him for a few seconds before bursting out in a scream.

'Yaaaaaaaaay!' She screamed out running towards him with open arms.

Startled at the sudden movement, Sasuke took a step back and Sakura promptly hit the floor.

She lay there lifeless with her head in the dirt for a few minutes.

Growing impatient, Sasuke began poking her warily with a stick.

'Uh, Sakura?'

She didn't budge.

**Inner Sakura: What are you doing?!?!! Sasuke was about to make a move on you stupid!!!**

…

**Inner: Sakura: GYAH! Wake the hell up you twit!!!!!!**

…

**Inner Sakura: Well fine! I'll just have to take matters into my own hands.**

Sasuke watched as Sakura's eyes fluttered open and she hauled herself to her feet.

**Inner Sakura: Hell Yes! It's good to be in control!**

She looked around and caught sight of her reflection in a window she lowered the zipper on her red dress to reviel more cleavage.

**Inner Sakura: Damn I'm such an uber hottie! **

Satisfied she continued to look around.

She instantly knew where she was.

She strode off, then stopped and stared back at Sasuke.

'Yo! You coming or what?'

Somewhat surprised, Sasuke jumped to his feet and scurried to catch up to her.

Once he was closely behind her once again he got out his trusty pick up guide.

Deciding he'd had enough of chat up lines he skipped ahead to step 5:

**Step 5 – Gifts**

**Pink haired Kunoichi's love gifts! Especially flowers.**

**Note: **

**I do not recommend Ino's flower shop. The blonde behind the counter will talk your ear off and possibly try to steal you for herself.**

'Hm… Flowers, seems safe enough.'

He looked around and spotted a few flowers growing by the fence of someone's house.

He plucked a few and shook the dirt off them.

He shrugged to himself before shoving them in Sakura's face.

Inner Sakura stared at them. **( Though, she's not really INNER Sakura now… if you get me. Maybe I should call her regular Sakura? Hm..)**

'A **_Daisy_**?'

He nodded and grinned stupidly.

'A **freakin'** **_daisy_**? What are you a **girl**?'

She whacked him round the head.

'Have some balls Uchiha!'

'**EH?!**'

She grabbed him by the back of his shirt and began dragging him down the path again.

**Pfft, That sure as hell didn't work. I think I'm safer with the chat up lines.**

Turning the page back he read through more suggestions for good chat up lines.

**May I Butter your muffin? What the hell does that mean?**

Shaking his head he looked harder.

'Hey, um Sakura… If I bit my lip would you kiss it better?'

She let go of his shirt and spun around to face him.

Sasuke couldn't help but notice how she looked a lot more stable this time.

He opened his mouth to say something but she interrupted him.

'No.' She said firmly.

But he found it hard to ignore a certain glint in her eye that made him nervous.

She leaned in closer to him and he held his breath.

'…But I'll bite it for you If you want…' She whispered seductively before grabbing him by his collar and kissing him intensely.

Sasuke's eyes grew wider as she pushed herself up against him and kissed him more passionately.

Sakura felt the electricity rush through her body and she immediately snapped back into consciousness.

She Ignored the dizzy feeling as she recognized Sasuke's lips on her own and immediately tore herself off them.

**Inner Sakura: GODAMMIT! Why? Why do you always ruin it!?!?**

**Regular Sakura: -Giggling- All in good time…**

A mischievious grin graced her features.

Grabbing Sasuke by the hand she skipped off.

Sasuke wasn't too concerned with where she was taking him.

Instead he was desperately flicking through the book at ways to get another kiss like that.

Unfortunately he had used up all the 'Subtle' Chat up lines, so he flicked a few pages ahead.

**Step 7: - flattery**

**Women respond well to compliments.**

**Go ahead! Compliment her womanly shape.**

**Note:**

**Women consider it a compliment, for you to grope their womanly assets.**

Sasuke, obviously not in his right state of mind, went in for the kill.

He stretched out his hand towards her butt and..

'AYAH! HENTAI!'

**Inner Sakura: Shut UP moron! It doesn't matter if it's SASUKE!**

**Oh! HA HA HA! yea… **

'… Please don't hurt me…' He said with watery chibi eyes.

**Awww kawaaaiii! **Inner and Outer Sakura thought Simultaneously.

Sasuke mentally recalled what it said in the guide.

**Note:**

**Girls like men who are MANLY.**

He quickly caught on, that pleading for his safety from a _kunoichi_ with _pink_ hair wasn't very manly.

He immediatley hesistated and in an attempt to gain back the remains of his manliness he blurted out.

'Psh. I take offence to the mere SUGGESTION that I would molest you!!'

He tried to pull off what could barely be considered a glare.

BANG!

'BAD kitty!'

Sakura grabbed Sasuke who was now clutching his head in agony and hauled him down the path once again.

**Ow!! Man this thing SUCKS! **

He tossed the book down a nearby alley in his fury and crossed his arms across his chest defiantly as he allowed Sakura to drag him away.

**

* * *

****Meanwhile In the Alley…**

Lee ducked behind a dumpster hoping Sasuke hadn't seen him.

'Phew! I do not think that the Uchiha has seen me-PAH!'

He stumbled backwards as a pink book whacked him in the face.

He stared at it flabbergasted**. (A/N Ha Ha what a magnificent word… Flabbergasted teehee!)**

'How to pick up pink-haired nins' He mumbled.

His eyes glittered and a wide grin appeared on his face as he buzzed up and down on the spot.

He slowly opened the book biting his bottom lip in anticipation.

**Welcome! To the introduction of 'How to pink up haired nins!'**

**We are going to help you successfully seduce that pink haired kunoichi you've so obviously been pining for.**

**Note: No. You really wern't as subtle as you thought you were.**

'Damn, I thought for sure that she would've assumed it was the Encouraging Citizens of Konoha that sent her those 350 LeeSaku dolls!'

He continued to read:

**Do you have a role model you wish to some day be like? Does this role model get girls easily?**

**If so then simply follow their lead and your girl is soon be to falling into your lap!**

**Note:**

**If this fails then see our step by step guide to tell you exactly how to handle pink haired Nins.**

He slammed the book shut and held it before him in wonder.

'**Then it is settled! I will grow my hair out so I may look like Neji!'**

and with that he gallivanted off in the opposite direction.

**

* * *

****7 minutes and 53 seconds later…**

Sakura smiled proudly and finally released Sasuke from her grasp.

She held out the palm of her hand expectantly.

He stared at it blankly.

'Key.' She demanded.

'huh?'

She sighed and turned around reaching up to a small hole in the side of the door frame.

and pulled out a spare key.

**Hn. I really should move my spare key. It's seems a lot of people hide their's in the same place.**

'EH?!'

He stumbled back in shock as he realized exactly where he was standing.

Sakura mentally praised her fangirl instincts and wandered inside.

Sasuke was rooted to the spot in utter shock.

'Come on Sasuke-kun! Let's go have fun!'

Stomping back outside, she yanked him in and slammed the door behind her.

Loud Banging and Crashing could be heard as the drunken pair made their way up to Sasuke's bedroom.

Both of them blissfully unaware, of the Jounin, the Sannin and the drunk, who were all outside silently fighting for a better view.

'fun indeed' muttered the Sannin as he aimed his camera in the direction of Sasuke's bedroom.

'-hic- Perv.'

To be continued…

* * *

**Thanks for reading!**

**I'm trying to get up to 70 reviews for this story! Please help? **

**I'll give you special mention in chapter 4 if you've reviewed all three chapters:D**

**Neji:-Cough- Bribery**

**Whack!**

**Neji: Oh silly me! I must have read it wrong! heheh My Byakugan's been playing up and well you know I think I'm far sighted... -rants on and on-**

**Thanks for reading!**

**Pretzel Face x**


	4. Wake up Konoha!

**Summary: This chapter is stupid and pretty much just a link to my Next chapter, So read on blah blah and fake laughter if necessary.**

**Sorry I took so long to update. Exams are a bitch. I apologize in advance for the poor quality of this chapter and the lack of SasuSaku. You may reach through the computer and slap me.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. See? Do you see? The lack of imagination? -Sob-**

**Special Thanks to: hinatachidori87, Kakashi500, yumi hasegawa (and Cheerio-panda45- For saying you like Pretzels : )**

* * *

It was a blissful morning in Konoha. 

The sun shone brightly and decorate the landscape of Konoha with it's beautiful rays.

The Birds chirped happily and no one could possibly deny that fact that today was indeed a lovely day.

With the exception of course, of a few young Kunoichi,

Who were currently waking up to find themselves in peculiar places,

…and no recollection of how they got there.

* * *

**Down at the Hyuuga compound…**

Neji had been awake for a few hours before he had even attempted to wake Tenten.

**Hn. She drank a lot last night she's not going to feel all that great and I can handle my drink a lot better than she can.**

Even so, He had been trying to wake Tenten for the last 15 minutes and she hadn't budged.

'Err Tenten… I'm going downstairs for a while…'

There was no response from the sleeping Kunoichi.

'If you wake up, I'm gonna leave some of Hinata-sama's clothes here…'

'…'

'Ok?'

'Mmphgloobrmn mimpifle wmrrd.'

'Ok then.'

He wasn't to sure about leaving her alone.

But then again. He would much rather be far FAR away, when she woke up.

**There's a high probability she won't remember a lot about last night.**

And Neji sure as hell didn't want to be the one to tell her.

* * *

**Elsewhere…**

Hinata shifted as she came round from her deep sleep.

She felt the a wave of cold wash over her as she snuggled up in whatever was wrapped around her.

**Hm. Whatever it is… It smells good…**

Her eyes fluttered open to a wave of bright orange.

Her vision was a bit blurred but that didn't make it any less shocking when she looked up to see a smiling Naruto staring down at her.

**Oh my god!**

She gasped and jolted upright.

A wave of pain thumped in her head and she clenched her teeth.

**What the hell happened last night?**

She ignored the feeling in her stomach as she noticed the blush on Naruto's cheeks.

Naruto's jacket which had been laid around her shoulders had fallen too her waist to reveal Hinata in just her black lace undies and her boots.

She let out a silent yelp as she pulled it back around herself.

And instant blush stained her cheeks.

'Uh...Hey Hinata-chan.'

Naruto laughed nervously scratching the back of his head.

Hinata averted her eyes unable to keep eye contact without feeling faint.

She looked around, She was outside the Hyuuga compound, her and Naruto were laying on the grass.

**Why are we outside?**

Her question was soon answered.

'Err, You passed out before I managed to get you home. I would've gone in, but your dad seems like the protective type.'

Hinata felt the famiilar twinge in her stomach as she stared into his sparkling eyes.

Only this time is seemed to be multiplied by a hundred.

**Oh god. Naruto is here, and all I'm wearing is a pair of lace panties and a bra. **

**Great.**

Naruto seemed to notice the horrified look on her face.

'Uh, sorry but we lost your dress in the park around midnight…'

**The park…? I'd remember being in the park. Wouldn't I?**

She stared around once more and looked down at her self.

**Apparently not.**

'Um … Naruto-kun?' she spoke up quietly.

He looked at her to indicate he was listening.

'Um.. We didn't…'

Naruto blushed.

'Er well…heh, well… we started to… but I figured it was just the vodka talking so I thought I'd take you home.'

She didn't miss the hint of disappointment in his eyes.

'But…Uh You looked really pretty last night Hinata-chan…'

She felt the twinge in her stomach again and stared at him in awe.

**Tell him! Do it now! Stop being so pathetic and just get it out!**

'Um, It wasn't just the alcohol and stuff…' She whispered.

She hated the shyness of her voice.

'I-I really like you Naruto-kun' She rushed out.

Her heart felt like it was doing back flips.

**I can't believe I said it!**

Naruto stared at her in disbelief.

He noticed the tinge of her cheeks and the way her hair was all fluffy and unbrushed.

**Hinata-chan looks pretty in the morning.**

His eyes drifted down to hers and he began to move closer to her.

When suddenly!

Shino popped out of a strategically placed bush!

'No! I will not accept this! Hinata! You don't want him!'

'...'

'Woah! Shino you actually talk!'

Shino threw a dirty look in Naruto's direction**. (A/n … err from behind his super black glasses –cough-)**

'Come on, Hinata I'm way better for you! I spent all weekend training my bugs so they can give you a SUPRISE!'

He grinned at her flirtily.

'…'

'Crap, no- Hinata, Stop! you can't use Bug Spray!'

'Perv!'

'What?! No, I was just gonna have my bugs spell you name out in the grass!'

'..oh…'

-Blink Blink-

Hinata continued to spray at him until the couple watched as he ran off into the distance.

'Nyaaa! Man. Chicks are so weird! Cha! Why couldn't I of had a cute puppy, chicks love puppies! But no… It had to be bugs… It had to be bugs…'

Now that shino was out the way, Hinata lent back into Naruto's arms.

(**A/n** **and cue romantic music!)**

Their eyes locked again and he leaned in, Hinata's stomach lurched again. Only this time she realized it wasn't from Naruto.

She stood up quickly and promptly threw up all over the side of the wall.

**Uh my stomach. What the hell did I eat last night? A freakin' Bear?! **

Naruto was immediately at her side.

**Ugh. Nice.**

He wrapped his jacket around her once more (To avoid embarrassment for both of them) and put one arm around her waste for support.

**Man I'm so glad I have Kyuubi to avoid stuff like this.**

The two of them quickly forgot about Hinata's confession as Naruto helped an unsteady Hinata round to the front gate.

And even though Hinata had a killer headache and was trying her hardest to prevent herself from throwing up all over her life long crush.

When she felt Naruto's strong arms around her waist,

She decided, She wasn't hugely regretting last night.

* * *

**Meanwhile Inside…**

Tenten awoke to the sharp light that was streaming into her room.

**Ugh. Windows suck.**

She closed her eyes tightly to shut out the bright light coming from her window.

It wasn't long before she caught on.

**Woah, ok, that window's moved…**

Sitting bolt upright she winced at the thumping headache she had aquired.

'Ok, I need some aspirin like nowish.' She groaned.

She shifted in her bed and her hair cascaded down her front covering her bare body.

'EEE!'

Instantly she pulled the sheets up around her.

That was when she realized they weren't her sheets at all.

Panicking, her eyes darted around the unfamiliar room and her clothes were lying scattered on the floor, intertwined with…

_**Neji's clothes?**_

She gasped as she began remembering her and Neji's night of passion.

Groaning she sunk back down into his bed.

**Oh god. No. Tell me this isn't happening.**

-Flash back-

'-giggling- Hm. Hey Neeeeeji? What are condoms for?

'…'

'Making popsicles right?!'

-End Flashback-

She groaned shoving her head into his pillow.

She breathed in his sweet fragrance.

Once she had calmed herself she slowly shrugged of the sheets.

Uncomfortable with her nudity, she scurried around as fast as she could collecting all her clothes off the floor.

**Geez, Boys are so messy. Neji's room is such a pig sty.**

After collecting all her clothes from the midst of all the mess, Tenten pondered on whether she should put back on her clothes from yesterday.

**Ew gross. Im SO not re-using underwear.**

When she spotted the clothes Neji had left out for her.

Sighing with relief she crept over to them, covering her 'naughty bits' with her clothes.

Suddenly a knock came from the door.

'Neji-Sama?'

Tenten panicked as she heard the woman's voice from the other side of the door.

**Eep! Who was that? Neji's maid?**

The door began to open and she instantaneously dropped her clothes and dove under his bed.

Unfortunatley for Tenten it wasn't exactly clean under there either.

**Hmph. Im supposed to be a bad-ass Kunoichi and I'm hiding stark naked under Neji's bed. **

**How stealthy of me.**

'Neji-sama? I'm here for your laundry… oh.'

The maid immediately noticed Neji wasn't there.

She took that as her opportunity to give Neji's room a quick spruce up.

Tenten watched uncomfortably as the lady scurried around picking up all Neji's clothes off the floor.

She could see her clothes out of the corner of her eye.

She tried to slip out her hand to try and grab them before the Maid did.

But she wasn't quick enough.

**Eep! No!! **

**Damn. Hinata will know they are my clothes! **

**Ugh, So much for keeping last night between the two of us.**

**I am NEVER going to hear the end of this.**

Tenten pouted as the maid scooped up her clothes and looked at them quizzically.

But Tenten was more concerned about the fact that the maid didn't look all that surprised to find girls clothes in Neji's room.

She simply rolled her eyes and tossed them into her laundry bag!

**Huh? What's with THAT? **

At this point Tenten was happier to cling the slight (Yet impossible) chance that Neji was a cross dresser.

Rather than to accept the possibility he may have had other girls in his room.

When something else caught her attention.

'Hm. Why are Hinata-Sama's clothes in Neji's room?' The maid piped up.

**Oh no.**

'Hm. I should probably go put them back.'

She grabbed Hinata's clothes took another quick glance around the room and strolled out.

All Tenten could do was stare after her horrified.

**Oh. I am SO becoming a Nun after this.

* * *

**

**10 minutes later...**

**Maybe I should go check if Tentens awake.**

When Neji opened the door, His room was spotless.

His eyes fell on the empty bed.

Tenten saw his ankles from her uncomfortable position underneath his bed.

'Neji! Is that you?'

**Oh god please be Neji.**

'Tenten…. What are you doing?'

Tenten sighed in relief at the sound of his voice.

She saw his hand grip the sheets, as he knelt to peer underneath the bed.

He was met with a fist in the face.

**Hn. Ow…Geezus, I rock her world and this is the thanks I get.**

'Don't LOOK Neji! I'm kinda naked here!'

'Uh…Why?'

'It's a long story, just don't look I'm coming out now'

'It's not like I haven't seen it all before.'

With that Tenten's cheeks burned bright red with a mixture of anger and embarassement.

'You better not even _think_ about using Byakugan!'

'Uh, It doesn't really work like that Tenten.'

'Oh YEAH RIGHT, Why else would Hinata like Naruto if she couldn't see his 'Proud Warrior'? Im not a complete moron you know!'

'Oh you're right. You're just under my bed naked because your a freakin' genius.' Neji Shot back.

'Ugh! Just keep those sexy white eyes of yours Shut or you'll loose them.'

Neji Smirked.

'They're shut right?'

'Yes! Just hurry up and come out! We're late for training.'

Tenten wriggled out from under Neji's bed and not so gracefully got to her feet.

It didn't take long for Neji to get her something to wear, and the two silently headed off to find Lee and Gai sensei.

Whilst they walked, Neji began to notice the uncomfortable atmosphere creeping up of Himself and Tenten.

He had always found her difficult to talk to.

He was _the_ Hyuuga Neji and she was a particularly attractive Kunoichi after all.

Even So, he wasn't sure why, but for that brief period when Tenten was stuck under his bed he felt he could have told her anything.

He liked that feeling.

**Hn. Maybe she should come over more often.**

If she was in his bed or under it,

He didn't suppose it would make a difference.

* * *

**Meanwhile… up on the rooftops of Konoha…**

Tsunade's eyes fluttered open and she felt the familiar symptoms of her usual hangover.

What wasn't so familiar to her however, was waking up in the arms of Jiraiya.

Who appeared to have dribbled all down his front.

**Urgh!**

She shivered at the thought of having slept all night in the arms of _that._

She made a movement to shrug his arms off of her but his hands fell lower down her back and he unconsciously groped her cushy behind.

Her eye twitched and her face burned red as she saw a familiar smile creep upon the sannins features.

'Jiraiya…' She said warningly.

The smirk instantly vanished and he pretended to be asleep again.

Not for long.

Tsunade whacked him in the face and sent him hurling into his camera that had been set up not to far from him.

Tumbling off the roof he made a grab for his camera in mid air, before watching it smash into pieces on the hard ground.

He soon followed hitting the pavement like a Hefty Bag filled with Chicken soup. **(A/n Whey!)**

'Ha!' yelled Tsunade triumphantly, staring down at the man who was face down on the ground.

He groaned.

Kakashi who had been up long before, merely watched in amusement as he turned the page of the orange book that never seemed to leave his hands.

Jiraiya picked up the remains of his camera and sobbed into the segments of his 'inspiration'

'_You!_' he pointed at her accusingly. 'You evil Big breasted woman!'

but the scowl on his face turned to a pout as he notices the Hokage's attention was elsewhere.

He followed her eyes and his jaw promptly fell to the ground.

'aa..y..i..a…wah?'

The sannin was speechless at the sight of so many young well formed women Throwing themselves at-

'Is that … Rock lee?!'

Rock lee, Who appeared to have a long chocolate coloured, girls wig plonked on his head was currently draped in beautiful girls.

'Ooh… Lee-kun… please be nice to us!'

'Don't worry girls, I'll be gentle…' He spoke up in a voice dangerously similar to Gai's.

'Nyaaaaa! Lee-kuun'

The girls continued to fawn over him and Jiraiya's eyes looked like they were falling out.

Kakashi returned his eyes to his book once more.

'What the hell do they see in rock lee?'

Tsunade smirked.

'You ever seen how fast that kid is without his weights on?'

Kakashi raised an eyebrow.

He was well aware that women had a certain 'need' for stamina and endurance in their men.

-Poof!-

Gai appeared on that creepy looking Turtle of his.

'Pretty impressive of my student eh Kakashi!'

Kakashi looked up from his book.

His eyes instantly began to glitter as he stared at him pleadingly.

He got on his knees and began tugging at him clothes.

'Let me ride the turtle... come on pretty please'

'Sure let me borrow sharingan for the day,'

'DEAL!'

Tsunade rolled her eyes, and stared back down at Jiraiya.

He appeared over-joyed at the fact that these women had some how ended up in his company.

**It's like DESTINY!**

Tsunade's eyes narrowed as she watched the Sannin tidy himself up before making a beeline for the girls.

**Ugh what a perv going after girls half his age. **

**Looks like I need to knock some more sense into him.**

She jumped off the roof and landed on her feet with a loud thud on the hard floor causing gigantic cracks to make their way down the street.

But where she had expected to have to drag Jiraiya away from the girls,

His attention seemed to have immediatly been pryed away from the young women to Tsunade's heaving bosoms.

Which had yet to calm themselves from the jump off the building.

His eyes followed them as they bobbed up and down.

Growing extremely irritated she whacked him around the head and dragged him away up onto the roof.

He giggled stupidly as she set him down.

'mmmnn. Just think how fast she'd be if she didn't have to drag those things around all day… Faster than rock lee no doubt' He mused.

His eyes never left her chest and he was drooling all over himself.

He seemed to have forgotten she was standing right in front of him.

Her eyes darkened and she began to crack her knuckles.

When suddenly!

xPrincessGothx, Onyx Eyed Kitten, snowy-rose, FantaGrl64 and Sweet Kisses9 Jumped out of strategically placed tree! **(A/n oh ho ho a TREE I'm living on the edge now!)**

**(a/n thanks for the reviews guys! Tell me If I left any one out! x)**

Using there ultra mega fighting powers they all joined forces and to put it simply, beat the shit out of Jiraiya!

**CRACK! BANG! KA POW!**

His yelps echoed throughout Konoha.

Waking up a certain pink haired Kunoichi not too far away…

**To be continued...**

* * *

**Sakura: Finally! It's about time I got some god damn action in this fanfic! **

**Gaara: What some more? -Wink Wink-**

**Sasuke: -Fires up chidori- Back. Off.**

**Gaara: Oh, yeah, right Sasuke, like chirping birds are going to scare me?**

**Sasuke: … : ( ... -Sob- If I had the power of 100 Reviews-No-Jutsu I wouldn't be having this problem!!**

**For the love of God save Sasuke! Review! Review I tell you!**

**Btw I know this chapter Isn't my best, But I really had to post something! You guys were ready to eat me! **

**Pretzel Face x**


	5. Ino Vs Temari

**Summary:**** Sakura realises she will actually have to face Sasuke after their drunken night of passion. Ino and Shikamaru have a breakfast date, only to be interrupted by Temari and her Siblings.**

**Disclaimer: oh! OH! Disclaimer?!?! Where?? WHERE?!? ... I don't own Naruto... **

**Thanks to the inspiration of ****hinatachidori87**** As a result Gaara does get high on suger in this chapter. Enjoy!**

**Thanks for all your reviews! They mean alot! and err.. Thanks to those of you who threatened to eat my ring fingers if i didn't update...**

**Once again I apologise for taking so long. Feel free to attack any of my teachers with Kunai. You'll hear no complaining from me:)**

* * *

**Previously...**

**His yelps echoed throughout Konoha.**

**Waking up a certain pink haired Kunoichi not too far away...**

Sakura awoke to an irritating commotion from outside.

She turned over and smushed her face in to her pillow.

'It huuuurts' She groaned as she turned over.

**Geez what is there an eathquake in my brain or something?? What the hell happened last night?**

**Inner Sakura:**** Heh. You don't remember?**

**Well, Erm. I Vaguely remember. not much... I remember being with Kakashi Sensei and Naruto. **

**-Flash back-**

'_Sasuke- Kun's my __**boyfriend**__, he likes it when we hold HAAAANDS'_

'_Shut up Sakura.' _

_-End flashback-_

**Oh my gosh I said that?!?**

**Inner Sakura:**** Well, You know what they say a drunk girls words are a sober girl thoughts!**

**I am seriously considering sticking my fingers through my eye sockets and up into my brain just to get rid of you!**

**Inner Sakura:**** Hey! Who's the one secretly pining over Sasuke and who's the one getting us a permanent spot in his bed?**

Sakura practically choked on her own tongue.

**WHAT? **

She sat up immediatley noticing her unknown surroundings.

**This is **_**Sasuke's**_** room?**

**Inner Sakura:**** Duh moron.**

Sakura's eyes followed the trail of clothes leading from the door to the bed.

She blushed as she caught sight of her panties hanging from the lampshade.

'Oh God.'

* * *

**Elsewhere...**

Ino clung to Shikamaru's arm as she skipped down Konoha high street.

She turned to him beaming,

'This was a **great** idea Shika-kun!'

He attempted to shrug her off.

But was un-successful.

'Hn. It was _**your**_ idea Ino.'

'Hmph.'

Ino dropped his arm and turned to glare at him.

'Ugh. Here's a little_** tip**_ about women Shikamaru.'

**Uh oh. **

He was unsure whether he should thankful that she'd stopped calling him _Shika-kun._

Or be worried about the fact she used his full name.

**Oh Geezus, what did I do now??**

'If a girl gives you credit for being thoughtful and _romantic _with things such as suggesting a breakfast date, then just **accept** it!'

He rolled his eyes as he watched her turn on her heels and stomp off ahead.

**Psh. Troublesome women.**

On the other side of Konoha, Sakura was busy hyperventilating.

'Oh god. Oh god. I'm. In Sasuke's. Room.'

**Inner Sakura:**** What the hell are you freaking out for? You've seen his room before on that fan girl site remember?**

'Oh yeah **right! **Like that's the same thing!'

**Inner Sakura:**** We so have to tell Ino about this. She is gonna be SO freakin' **_**JEALOUS!**_

'Ino!'

**She will SO know what to do.**

Sakura quickly scrambled across the room, keeping the sheets wrapped tightly around her naked body.

She dived for her cell phone that lay on the opposite side of the room.

She frantically began to dial.

Ino was in the middle of flouncing off dramatically, when she heard her phone ringing from inside her pocket.

She threw one last glare back at Shikamaru before answering.

'Hello?' She answered in a girly sweet tone.

'Ino!' Came Sakura's hushed voice from the other end of the line.

'Forehead? Hey where'd you get to last night? Didn't you leave with Sasuke-kun?'

'Err, that's kinda why I'm calling.'

Shikamaru watched quizzically as Ino's eyes grew wide.

He sped up a little, just enough to be able to hear snippets of her conversation, but not enough to look like he was actually interested in anything.

Ino was yelling heatedly down the phone line.

'Perhaps if I_ showed_ you then you might be able to get it through your freakishly large forehead, I'm on a _**DATE**_ Sakura!'

Shikamaru rolled his eyes.

**Psh. Why do chicks have to label every damn thing. Did she ever stop to think that maybe I was just hungry**

'Ugh, so what you expect _me _to do, Sakura? knock on the door while you climb out the window?'

Shikamaru smirked. I didn't take a genius to work out what had happened last night.

**Get in there Sasuke.**

'What about Training Sakura! You have to face him sometime!'

Ino's sighed exasperatedly.

'GoodBYE Sakura!'

Sakura sobbed at the sound of the dial tone as Ino hung up.

**Nooo! That bitch! She was my only chance of avoiding major embarrassment.**

**Inner Sakura:**** Um Avoiding Embarassment? I'm assuming you're forgetting about the forehead thing you step outside with everyday?**

**UGH SHUT UP!!!**

Sakura's battle of the minds **(A/n some call it schizophrenia we call it entertainment :D)** was interrupted as a faint knock came from the door.

Her eyes shot up and she held her breath.

…

* * *

**Inside Dave's Diner...**

Ino peered over her breakfast menu at Shikamaru who was lazily slouched back in his chair.

A faint smile crept upon her lips.

**Aw. He's so cute!**

His eyes wandered to hers and their eyes locked.

As if uncontrollably Shikamaru felt himself leaning across the table to be closer to her.

But he saw the faint smile disappear from Ino's face and paused.

**Huh?**

Shikamaru jumped as a pair of arms snaked their way around his neck.

**Wtf?**

Ino's eye's narrowed as her gaze fell on her rival.

'Shikamaru! Look at you here! All alone!'

The sound of Temari's voice echoed in Ino's ears.

But Shikarmaru didn't pick up on the hint of malicious sarcasm in Temari's words.

'Err, Temari I'm here with Ino.'

'Oh ok. Wanna go for a walk?' Temari persisted.

'…No, I'm still here with Ino.'

Ino smirked.

**Yeah. That's your cue to get your sandy arms off my man.**

She got her wish as Gaara tugged frantically on Temari's elbow.

'Ugh. WHAT?!' She spat back at him.

'LOOK!'

He giggled as he pointed at a tray of sugar packets.

'WTF? Shut _up_ Gaara! Go and hang out with Kankuro or something.' She hissed shoving him out the way.

The three watched as Gaara loaded up with sugar and sped off in the direction of the little ninja's room.

There stared at each other in utter confusion for a few seconds.

Ino was the first to speak.

'Look Temari' she put on a fake sweet voice.

'Shikamaru and I would like to be _alone,_ and for that to happen. You would have to go somewhere that's _away_.'

'Oh! Don't tell me I'm interrupting a _**date**_? Oh so _sorry_!' She teased.

Ino stiffened as Temari flashed her a Malevolent smile.

'Hey Ino, I heard the profiteroles are **great** here! But then again, I guess your watching your waist line, right?'

Temari watched as all the colour drained out of Ino's face.

**W-w-what? She thinks I should be watching my weight?! But I just lost three pounds! Oh god. I need to go look in the mirror.**

'Err... Excuse me a moment… I need to go to the little girls' room…'

She unsteadily got to her feet and made her way to the bathroom.

But something about the flirty sound of Temari's voice behind her made her stop.

She spun round to face her.

'Why don't you just get your own guy, Temari?'

The majority of the diners looked up from their breakfasts.

Ino ignored them and continued glaring at Temari.

'Heh. Well I thought I already had, but if you're serious. Wanna fight for him?'

She winked at Shikamaru.

Ino's face burned with anger.

**Oh you are so going down bitch.**

Before Ino could prepare herself a violent wind whirled throughout the diner.

-Fwooooosh!-

Temari giggled.

'I can see your paaaaaaaaaaaanties!'

Ino blushed as she tried to tug her skirt back down.

The wind died down and Ino started performing furious hand signs.

'Mind control justu!'

Shikamaru watched in awe.

**Well... Can't deny the beauty of Ino's panties.**

* * *

**Meanwhile, Outside Dave's Diner…**

Chouji wiped is forehead as he continued his daily jog down the streets of Konoha.

Since he'd started his diet the smell of bacon that always came from within Dave's Diner was a constant test of his willpower.

But today as Chouji neared the café something was different.

He tried to ignore the commotion from within the diner and continued jogging.

As he got closer Chouji could make out two high pitched screams.

Unable to fight his curiosity and carry on with his workout he stopped and headed towards the entrance of the cafe.

His Ninja reflexes caused him to dodge as a plate came hurtling towards him.

Shocked he peeked round the door of the diner.

'Arrrrgh! You did not just touch my hair!'

The girlish war cries of Temari and Ino echoed in Chouji's ears.

Chouji watched as he saw Temari open her fan slightly.

'Haha. Take a look. This is the first moon. There are two more. When you see three moons, you'll know you've lost the fight for Shikamaru!'

'Moons? You're scaring me with moons? Moons are about as scary as baby koala bears!

'Oh well we'll see about that.'

A large force of wind sent Chouji stumbling to the back of the café.

Where Shikamaru sat looking as sluggish as ever.

'Oh hey Chouji.' he said in his usual monotonous tone.

'Dude what the hell is gong on with Temari and Ino?'

Shikamaru just sighed and muttered under his breath about girl troubles.

Chouji took a seat next to Shikamaru and watched as a timid waitress scurried around the fighting Kunoichi to get to their table.

'Hello and welcome to Dave's Diner is there anything I can get you?'

Shikamaru smirked.

**There's no way Chouji's diet is gonna last in here.**

'Err, yeah I'll have some chicken wings please.' Shikamaru said sneaking a sideways glance at Chouji.

'Ok and anything for you sir?'

She turned and looked at Chouji who simply shook his head firmly.

'I do not need chicken wings! That is my way of the ninja!'

'Oh ok..' She said slightly intimidated by Chouji's out burst.

He watched as waitress hurried back to where she came from.

'You don't feel like you need some chicken wings Chouji?'

'Certainly not 'need'. Probably not even want.'

His face dropped.

'I just occasionally... have this nagging implacable emptiness... that I think a chicken wing might fill…' he sobbed.

'Well I think it's great your sticking to this diet thing, good for you.'

In a flash Chouji's hand was in the air as he frantically tried to gain the attention of the waitress again.

**I'm gonna need something to take my mind off those chicken wings.**

'Waitress! Can I just have a tea please, whole milk No sugar.'

'Err Chouji? Whole milk?'

'YES FREAKIN' WHOLE MILK!' He snapped. '...Geez, I ask for whole milk and people look at me like I wanna suck it right off the cow or something.' He grumbled.

**Whoa. Ok. I really should learn not to anger Chouji when he's deprived of chicken wings.**

Chouji and Shikamaru's attention was quickly returned to the girls wrestling on the floor.

They watched in awe as the girls launched themselves at each other and hurled more girlish insults.

**Someone really should stop them.**

'Hey Shikamaru aren't you gonna go help Ino?'

He sighed.

'Yeah. I could do that, but I'm paralyzed with not caring very much.'

Chouji rolled his eyes.

**Ino's gonna get her ass kicked if I don't do something.**

'Maybe I should go help her.'

'Dude don't go there man. It's not our place. We're men. We're not supposed to understand the sacred rituals of women.'

'So you're saying we should just let them get on with it?'

'Of course. Men are from venus and all that.'

'Men are from Earth. Women are from Earth. deal with it.' Came a womans voice from behind Chouji.

Chouji snapped his head round and came face to face with a bowl of chiken wings.

Shikamaru thanked the new waitress lazily as she set the food down on their table.

She was less attractive, with large lips, long dark hair and a suprisingly manly forehead.

**Hm. Sakura will be pleased.**

She glared at Shikamaru.

'Woah Pms or what.' He muttered under his breath earning himself another hard glare.

'For your information. I'm a guy.'

Shikamaru's Jaw hit the floor and Chouji began stuttering apologies for his friend.

She stomped off and sat down at the bar.

They both stared after her, mystified.

**Wow. A real life Transvestite.**

* * *

Ino broke away from Temari and glared at her. 

'Psh. Are you stupid or something? Can't you see that he's taken?'

'Me Stupid? You're so stupid you probably open a box of cheerios and go 'oh wow! Donut seeds!''

Ino's stared at her blankly.

'… Wtf are donut seeds?'

Temari smirked.

Ino's cheeks burned red as she heard Shikamaru suppress a laugh.

**Ugh. Great. Did I just say something way stupid?**

But Ino had a lot of practice in how to play off the cute little blonde act.

It was her specialty.

She giggled and shrugged and tossed her hair over her shoulder like always.

'Hm. What can I say, It all comes with being a hot blonde.' She said with a girlish smile.

Shikamaru stared at her in awe as her eyes glittered in the light.

**Damn she's pretty.**

Temari's eyes narrowed.

'Hey genius. I'm blonde too you know? Do you see me talking like a moron?'

'Psh. Total fake. Don't try and pass that massive bush of curly _dyed _hair as the real deal honey.'

Chouji could see Temari was getting ready to take Ino down.

**Ugh. Great. I hate to have to do this. But no one can beat an angry Ino.**

Chouji stood up and prayed for his own safety as he yelled at the top of his voice.

'Ino you're such a fat slut try jogging to get rid of all your fat, effing cow.'

The diner went silent.

Everyone stared at Chouji in disbelief.

Chouji was left trying to hurriedly think of an escape plan.

He wasn't coming up with many good ideas.

Ino's eyes blazed with fury.

The diners shuffled in their seats.

Kankuro, who was standing right next to Chouji decided to get out of the way in case Ino went for him.

He turned to move, But tripped over Gaara who had just wandered aimlessly out of the bathroom.

Not having a clue what was going on, It wasn't long before he broke the stunned silence.

He clambered up onto the table and grinned stupidly.

'The rain, In Spain, Falls mainly, On the Spaniards.' He announced.

Kankuro dragged Gaara down from the table who giggled stupidly.

He immediately jumped to conclusions.

'Damn it Gaara did you bring that shit with you all the way from sand?'

Gaara stared at him with a dazed expression as his brain processed the information.

'No no no no NO! I don't have anything illegal in my house anymore!'

'…'

'EXCEPT FOR THOSE MEXICANS I BOUGHT!'

Kankuro stared at him in disbelief.

'Oh.. Oh wait. I had to get rid of those…'

'Umm Gaara-'

'IS ANYONE SELLING MEXICANS?!'

He wandered around shouting at the top of his lungs.

'MEEEEXXXICAAANS???'

Gaara continued to question random citizens before his eyes filled with tears before charging out of the diner in determination.

Kankuro sighed in relief.

'Maybe a heroine addict will show him the path of justice.' He mumbled sarcastically.

His attention was quickly drawn back to Temari, who seemed to be making things harder for herself.

'Hey maybe you should listen to him Ino. I don't know how you even walk with those thighs of yours.'

In a second Ino launched herself at Temari in full on bitch mode.

Goodbye Ninja techniques.

Ino's hands grabbed hold of Temari's hair and they wrestled like cats on the floor of the diner.

In short. A MAJOR bitch fight ensued.

'YOU WATCH! I'll be the thinniest, most gorgeous girl this side of Sakura's forehead!'

Temari's nails dug into Ino's hands as she tried to make her let go.

The girls had resorted to biting each other and pinching.

Chouji sat back down in relief that he was out of Ino's line of fire.

'Wow Jiraiya would so love to be here.'

And as if by magic… **(A/N and nothing at all to do with me... )**

Who should stumble through the door?

But the Ero-Sennin we've all come to know and love!

'REFUGE! **REFUGE!** I NEED REFUGE!'

A black and blue, badly cut Jiraiya came staggering in the diner.

'LESBIANS! _LETHAL_ LESBIANS! ATTACKED ME!'

'Oh dude yeah. I saw. Sorry I didn't come to help out or nothing.' Spoke up Shikamaru.

'Yeah me too. I don't think they were lesbians though. But damn those girls were HAWT!' Yelled a guy from the counter.

'NOT LESBIANS?? HOW CAN THEY NOT BE LESBIANS! DID YOU SEE THEM FALLING FOR MY MANLY CHARM?'

'.. No.'

'I rest my case.'

Unable to stand any more Jiraiya collapsed in a seat at the bar.

When someone caught his badly bruised eye.

**Ooh Hello foxy mama! **

He dribbled unattractively, as a woman with long black hair and excessively big lips glanced in his direction.

She winked and Jiraiya nearly fell out his chair.

**Hm. Her manly forehead kinda reminds me of someone…**

Not caring in the slightest, He shuffled his stool closer to hers.

Just as Temari went flying across the room.

'Keep. Your. Hands. **Off.** My. Boyfriend.' Ino panted.

Kunkuro, immediately came to Temari's aid.

He was met with a weak slap in the face.

'I'm not losing to that bimbo!'

Either way Temari was in no state to argue.

**Argh. This sucks. Where the hell is Gaara when you need him.**

Almost on cue Gaara hurtled through the door of the Diner with an army of Mexicans trailing behind him.

'What's the greatest nation in the world?!'

The Mexicans stared at him blankly unable to understand what he was saying.

'What's the greatest Nation in the world?!' He yelled again this time to the inhabitants of the diner.

'Err.. Mexico?'

'**URI**nation! Haw! You idiots!'

'Err.. Gaara-'

'Hhahahaaa that's funny!' Gaara continued.

'…'

'Urination is pee by the way.'

'Yea.. I think we know-'

'Ha ha pee jokes own…'

'Gaara! Will you just shut up! We have to go!'

**Geezuz, who let this guy get high on sugar?**

Gaara rambled on ignoring Kankuro's orders to leave.

'Does any one know the name of that song by Frankie Lymon that goes Uhhh uhh uh uh uhahhhhh uhh uhh uh'

'Uh, no. no I don't. Did you hear what I just said?'

'One day I will find a way to implant annoying songs in other peoples heads  
it will be my supervillian power' He ranted on.

'Oh yeah sure, coz killer sand isn't bad ass enough…'

Half expecting Gaara to burst out in song he took his opportunity to get Gaara and Temari out of there.

Grabbing him by his collar he dragged him out.

His army of Mexicans trailing behind them in utter confusion.

* * *

Ino flicked her hair triumphantly, slicked on some lip gloss and went over to join Shikamaru. 

Shikamaru flinched worried about what she might do.

**Oh shit.**

He opened his mouth to start pouring out excuses.

'Ino I-' He was cut off as she plonked herself on his lap and tugged his hands around her waist.

**Mine all over.**

He smiled softly and hugged her closely as she shrunk back against him.

He gently pressed his lips to her shoulder.

'Hey..' He said softly.

'Hey.' She muttered, exhausted.

It was at this point that he realized.

If this was the result of a bit of girly competitiveness.

**Maybe I should get Ino jealous more often.**

* * *

Now that the entertainment was over it didn't take too long for them all to realize that they had lives of their own and better places to be. 

So slowly they all cleared out, including Shikamaru and Ino who left hand in hand.

**Yes! I can't believe he's finally my boyfriend! I can't wait till I tell Sakura!**

**Oh yeah… Sakura…**

**I should prolly avoid her for a while. She's gonna be pretty pissed that I left her.**

**Oh well!**

'Hey Shika-Kun wanna come back to mine?' She said sweetly.

He rolled his eyes and the use of that name again.

'Sure.' He complied.

The couple headed back to Ino's house.

Leaving Jiraiya and a certain transvestite alone in the mens bathroom.

**Heh. My obvious wit and charm has enticed this lovely lady.**

He ran his hand up her back and smelt her hair giggling to himself.

**Hang on a minute. Wait a minute... something about this is a little... odd...**

'Eh!?!' he yelped.

**Erm. **

**I believe this woman has more than the recommended amount of penises.**

But being the infamous Ero-Sennin, anything with lips and hips was good enough for him.

If only Sakura had chosen a man so simple minded.

Unfortunatley She hadn't.

* * *

Yes Indeed Sakura had chosen the most complex boy in all of Konoha to fall for. 

The result was, she was now having a monster panic attack. whilst naked in his bed.

**Oh god. That's Sasuke on the other side of that door and I look like shit! I haven't even brushed my hair yet!**

**Inner Sakura:**** Yea well love is blind and all that.**

**If that were anywhere near true then sexy lingerie wouldn't be so damn popular!**

**Inner Sakura:**** Right. Guess you're screwed then**

Sakura willed herself to move. To flatten her hair down, pretend to be asleep, ANYTHING.

But her arms and legs were frozen.

The door slowly opened.

**He so gonna hate me. Or think I'm like a slut or something. **

**Inner Sakura:**** Or maybe! He's made you pancakes and come to confess his undying love for you?**

But both of them knew full well that was just wishful thinking.

But Sakura wouldn't let go of the aching hope that he may have come for any other reason, than to chuck her out.

She held her breath as his ebony black spikes appeared from behind the door and Sakura heard the gentle click as he closed it behind him.

* * *

**'Mwahahahahaa! Bow before me you mortal fools! I am now your hokage!'**

**...Yes that's right readers. Hinata has indeed gone insane with the news that our next chapter will be the end of this fanfic!**

**-Sob-**

**Sit tight for the finale! Which by the way will be uninterrupted pure SasuSaku goodness!**

**Thanks for reading! **

**Pretzel Face x**

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	6. Pancake Mix

**Summary: Sakura has to face the consequences of her night on the town, and is forced to do so without any underwear.**

**Can't express my apologies for taking so long to update this chapter. I have no good excuses... :/ **

**I pretty much forgot what the fanfic was actually about so this was just something I whipped up... Hope its ok!**

**Thanks to all those people who have supported me through this fanfic! You're great!**

**On with the final chappie :'( **

**Final :'( Disclaimer: I deny any Naruto ownage. **

* * *

Previously...

**She held her breath as his ebony black spikes appeared from behind the door and Sakura heard the gentle click as he closed it behind him.**

His coldness seemed to fill the room, Sakura opened her mouth to speak but thought better of it.

'Here' He said bluntly, chucking a pile of clothes in her direction.

His all too familiar outfit hit her in the face.

'mmmph' she mumbled out from behind one of his t-shirts.

**Inner Sakura: mmm Smells goo-**_**ood.**_

Sakura hurredly pulled the clothes off her head.

'err.. thanks-'

She was cut off by the sound of the door shutting behind him.

'nyaaah! He's gone.' She whined.

She pouted down at the clothes in her lap.

**-Sigh- I am so not looking forward to this.**

She tugged on his t-shirt, and it instantly drowned her delicate frame, falling around her knees.

She blushed furiously as she saw a pair of Sasuke's boxers lying on top of his trousers.

'he can't seriously be expecting me to wear his boxers.'

**Inner Sakura: -Grinning- Chop Chop! Hop two! Move it Move it!**

She pulled them up over her legs but they immediatley feel down again.

Kicking them off her ankles she decided to go comando.

Once she was done getting changed she stared down at herself.

' I look utterly riddiculous' she giggled.

She wrapped her arms around herself and breathed in his aroma.

**Inner Sakura:**** What are high on Sasuke fumes? We've got the REAL THING downstairs!**

Sakura was dumped back to earth.

**oh right yeah.**

She reluctantly headed for the door.

Here goes everything.

* * *

Sasuke sat slumped over his dining table. 

Head pounding into his hands.

He groaned as he tried to shake the memory of last night from his mind.

Vivid flashbacks of himself, sliding lace panties down Sakura's pale thigh shot into view and he sunk down further into his chair.

**Geez those last two shots were real clever Uchiha.**

Sakura hitched up her trousers as she creeped down the stairs, she placed a hand on the the side of the door as she peered into the kitchen.

Her eyes fell on Sasuke.

She took a deep breath in and started towards him, but her foot caught in the bottom of her trousers and she buckled forward.

Staggering not so gracefully into to Sasuke's line of vision.

Sasukes eyes shot up as a heavy footed Sakura burst into the Kitchen.

She steadied herself and blushed deeply.

**well, that was a smooth entrace.**

**Inner Sakura****: Goodbye shreds of dignity.**

Sasuke smirked and lent back in his chair.

**Ugh. He's so smug. **

'Morning.'

Sakura willed her legs to move, but they rooted her to the spot.

She averted her eyes from his as she felt him locking onto her.

'... Morning' She replied timidly.

He began to stand up but instantly winced at the pain in his head.

A worried look flashed across her face as he collapsed back into his chair again.

' err... You ok?' she attempted to act nonchalant.

He groaned heavily and she took a seat next to him.

' Don't worry Sasuke-kun,' She cringed as the suffix slipped from her lips. 'You're just a bit hungover.'

He glared at her.

'I don't get hungover, Sakura.'

Now it was her turn to act smug.

'Right. Of course not.' She smirked as she took a seat next to him.

Her legs brushed his under the table and she jumped up.

Sasukes eyes followed her as he watched his clothes glide past her curves as she darted out of her chair.

The site of the Uchiha fan on her back seemed strangely suiting.

She cleared her throat in a desperate attempt to sound unphased.

'H-how about I make breakfast for you? That will make you feel better.'

Taking care of Sasuke, Thats what she did best.

**Inner Sakura****: Go for it Sakura, The best way to a man's heart is through his stomach!**

**I was being polite.**

**Inner Sakura****: in a 'wink wink nudge nudge' kind of way though right?**

**... Shut up.**

Sakura scowled as the voice in her head seemed to have an alterior motive for everything.

She prayed Sasuke didn't think she was just making excuses to stick around.

'I mean, It's the least I can do.. As you let me spend the night...' she blushed furiously.

**Oh great. Bring it up again. Imbecile.**

'Hn.'

He indicated to the pans on the side.

Sakura mentally kicked herself for not jumping out the window when she had the chance.

What were a few broken limbs compared to this unbearable tension.

She shuffled over to his fridge and tugged open the door, staring inside at his empty shelves, with a few cherry tomato's situated on the middle shelf.

She looked over at him in disbelief.

His head was still buried in his arms and she rolled her eyes.

Grabbing the tomatoes she returned to the table and plonked them in front of him.

He lifted his head up from the table and looked up at her.

'are you kidding me?' she asked.

**He can't seriously only have tomato's in his house.**

He shrugged and popped one in his mouth.

And small hint of contentment washed over his face and he reached for another.

She sighed.

**Now what.**

She didn't want to stick around and cause anymore un-necessary un-easiness between the two of them.

She searched her mind for excuses to leave.

'...err Maybe I should head back, I was suppo-'

'I think there's a pancake mix in the cupboard.' He interrupted.

He wasn't quite sure why, It had just slipped out. He could have just kept his mouth shut and he could forget all about the previous night.

But something in the back of his mind wasn't ready for her to leave yet.

She followed his eyes and and spotted the cupboard above her.

She tiptoed to reach the handle and surely enough inside lay one lone packet of pancake mix.

**Bleurgh. Pancake mix.**

For some reason she expected more from him, how hard is it to put a bit of flour and egg in a bowl?

**But then again this is Sasuke.**

Sasuke watched as she stretched for the Box, his top rode up on her, revealing a small portion of her back.

She strained further, determined.

**Urgh. This is discrimination against short people.**

She was ready for one last effort when an arm came from behind her and grabbed the box from her reach.

She spun around and came face to face with Sasukes chest.

her eyes slowly wandered up and his empty black pupils bore down on her.

He thrust the pancake mix into her hands.

'Hn. there.'

' T-thanks' she breathed.

She stared at the back of the packet as she tried to focus on the instructions.

Sasuke picked up on the flustered look on her face.

It didn't take einstein to realise she couldn't handle being in such a close proximity to him,

..not after last night anyway.

A thought as such, worried him a little.

He was fully aware of Sakura's instict to avoid awkward situations, even if she was oblivious to them most of the time.

But it was the idea that soon she may be avoiding _him _that made him feel rather...uncomfortable.

But it was interesting to say the least, that one night in his bed and he was already having this affect on her.

Smirking, he backed up.

**This could be interesting.**

* * *

**15 minutes later...**

Music was blaring in Sasukes Kitchen as Sakura turned up the volume.

He winced.

'Geez Sakura.'

'This song is soo goood!'

He scowled as an irritating female voice echoed in his head.

She flipped her pancakes like a pro, to the girly pop tune and Sasuke watched as she shimmied around in his baggy clothes.

Sakura could feel him watching her.

**Waaah Im doing everything like on the cooking channel, but it's not woorking!**

She sulked into her powdery pancake batter.

**Just add water my ass.**

'Need a hand?' Sasuke's smug voice came from over her shoulder.

She jumped and tried to act like se was doing something complicated.

But there was nothing left to do except serve her miserable excuse for a pancake.

She shifted to try and hide her creation from his view.

Peering over her shoulder he let out a taunting laugh.

He reached out to poke the folded mess but she slapped his hand away.

'hey! don't knock it till you've tried it!'

'Oh, no way am I putting that thing, in my mouth,' he teased.

Her eyes narrowed.

**OH REALLY?**

She pursed her lips and jabbed the pancake with a fork until it clung to the end in a jumbled heap.

Sasuke immediatley darted out the way.

'Oh don't even _try_ to run. Eat it!' She cried running after him, pancake hanging dangerously on the end of her fork.

'Wha- Geez Sakura. Be reasonable. Would_ you _eat_ that_?' he jumped as she clambered over his dining chairs to get to him.

She stopped in her tracks in a huff.

'Fine.' She said huffily.

She dumped it on a plate in front of her, Sat down elegantly and picked up her cutlery.

Sasuke still kept his distance, wary that this still maybe some kind of ruse to get the half over cooked, half under cooked 'pancake' into his stomach.

He watched bemused as she adamantly cut herself a slice.

**Heh. Rather her than me.**

Sakura was beginning to realise what her stubborness had got her into, as she drew her slice of pancake to her lips.

The site of it, if possible was looking even less appetising than it did at the start.

She forced a smile as she let the awful taste sit on her tongue.

'mmph it's so goodph' She mumbled through a mouthful of sticky powdery gloop, that didn't seem to like being chewed.

As much as Sasuke thought he would enjoy the site of Sakura choking on her own 'delicacy' he found himself becoming increasingly distracted by her shiny, petite lower lip.

They glistened as she brought another peice to her mouth, like two flower petals they enclosed themselves around her fork once again.

The soft smooth surface, he remembered the feeling of her soft lips on his as he touched her hair and they tumbled onto the bed.

They sparkled in the light and they seemed to be getting closer... and... closer-

'You're turn Sasuke-kun!'

He snapped back to reality, and realised she was within an inch from his face,

'Here comes the Aeroplane!' She chirped with a malicious grin on her face.

Before he could react a huge spoonful of pancake came hurtleing towards him and shoved it's way into his mouth.

A taste like no other filled his sensitive taste buds, it was as though he was eating a mixture of something he has left out in the sun for a while with a bit of sugar to mask the flavour.

The powder tickled his throat.

He shoved her out the way and began lapping up water from the sink uncontrollably.

He through a glare in her direction as her giggles filled the air.

'Oh you're such a child Sasuke-kun!'

'Hn. You can talk.'

-flashback-

(Insert childish behaviour from previous evening here) **A/n Heh laziness...**

-End Flashback-

An awkward Silence fell over the two as Sakura recalled the painful embarassment of the previous evening.

Sasuke watched her inquisitively as she seemed to be using every fibre of her being not to have a mental break down right there in his kitchen.

He sighed exasperatley.

Sakura finally plucked up the courage to clear the air.

'Uhm.. Sasuke-kun?'

He looked over at her.

'Hn?'

'erm...'

Her nervousness was painful to look at.

'Sorry.. you know about the whole...' She broke of in a trail of nervous laughter.

'Getting drunk and throwing yourself at me?'

**Ah. I love to aggrivate her.**

It wasn't that he liked her or anything.

He simply couldn't stand the way she was looking at him.

So he decided to put a stop to it.

The only way he knew how...

Her eye twitched.

He watched as the anger built up inside her.

It was, In a word... Sexy.

' I did NOT _throw_ myself at you!'

He smirked.

'Too bad.' He remarked.

It was then that he decided he didn't need to justify his actions.

He sauntered over to her and rested his arms on the counter either side of her.

His eye locked on hers and he held her gaze.

'I kinda liked it.'

Her eyes grew wide as his lips collided with hers.

He pushed his chest to hers and she felt his hands wind themselves around her waist, Eyes fluttering shut and she finally got over the shock of it all.

She leaned into him as he pulled her into him, tilting her head back he slipped his tongue into hers.

She felt hot as a tingle climbed up her kneck...She wasn't ready for this.

**I'm supposed to be the sensible one!**

But her hands betrayed her as they slid up behind his kneck and tangled themselves in his hair.

He couldn't take it anymore, he needed her.

Her heart beat raced against his chest and he slid a hand inside the shirt she was wearing.

He her cloth like skin invited him, their kiss grew more intese.

Memorising every curve as he moved his hand past her hips to her waist.

'You're beautiful,' he breathed as her stomach filled with butterflies. '...Even when your off your face.' He smirked into her lips.

She cringed suddenly becoming _very _aware of the fact she wasn't wearing any underwear.

Though as it turned out.

Underwear would have only been a nuisance to them anyway.

* * *

**I really hope you enjoyed this fanfic, I had loads of fun writing it, Maybe I'll write another SasuSaku sometime in the future But im not sure.**

**Thanks for reading!**

**Pretzel Face x**


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